Hatter's Harangue: March Madness

The Rabbit has been running around here in a frenzy reminding us all that we're late, so I suppose I should start by apologizing for the delay in putting out the March issue... but I have been bewaring the Ides, always bewaring the Ides. Besides, it's been pure Madness around this place all month and, of course, given the month in question the Hare has been harassing me to have his say, but between you and me he's more than a tad Mad himself, and so I've overruled that nonsense.

Let's see now. So much has happened since Maga's last ish that I hardly know where to begin. Across the border, March Madness has begun in earnest with Trump-mania, while here on this side of the great divide the CBC has been trying to act surprised that American liberal arts undergrad students seem to be more taken with Pierre's young lad than with the Donald. As for me, I've always been of the opinion that the nature and character of the man in the arena (or woman... with apologies to Ms Hillary) is the far more important consideration than whether s/he happens to deliver the pitch from the left hand or the right.

Speaking of, the Jays are looking at a kid who can pitch with both which, by my count, means he can also catch with both, but no one seems to care for that little tidbit. At any rate, the boys of summer are back and spring training is in full swing, as it were, so someone has deemed it a fitting opportunity to publish djeremy's too cute by half short story, Zone.

Next, a bit of sadness. We lost Harper Lee since last we spoke. Personally, I'm not entirely sure which is the more tragic between the cynical money raking publication of that little bit of trite Juvenilia in her final months with us, or her actual passing, but she was a literary giant of her own sort and left us behind perhaps the most beloved child heroine in all of literature; Alice might have something to say about that, but if you knew that brat like I do you'd think differently. In Ms Lee's honour, and in the spirit of that other March Madness business, we'll be settling the issue once and for all with our inaugural single elimination literary bracket in a quest to crown the Most Beloved Literary Child Heroine. Jeremy also promises a new video on character development in To Kill a Mockingbird, but he'd like to put it off until all the dishes have been washed, so we'll not hold our breath.

What else? Oh yes. By this time next week Spring will have Sprung upon us, but first we must do St Paddy's Day, and Easter soon to follow. We'll be paying homage to the one with Thoreau's penultimate Chapter of Walden on “Spring,” and to t'other with Jeremy DeVito's essay on Irish novelist Charles Maturin's classic, Melmoth the Wanderer, then touch the last with one of our most ancient and too oft neglected Old English poems, “The Dream of the Rood.” Finally, we'll circle back around and hit all three with a reprinting of “The Selfish Giant,” the heartbreaking Easter fairy tale about kindness and the coming of Spring by that Irish genius of letters, Oscar Wilde.

We'll tie it all up in a neat little bow with a video tutorial on the making of NovelTea's famous “James Joyce” Latte Macchiato, throw out a call for submissions, and shut it down for another month.

As always, I do hope you enjoy the ish, but if you don't, who cares for you? You're nothing but a pack of cards!